


If only he knew

by CaitlynPotter101



Category: Outer Banks - Fandom
Genre: M/M, Onesided, clueless pope, sad JJ
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-19
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:54:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23727916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaitlynPotter101/pseuds/CaitlynPotter101
Summary: JJ is a little fucked up with all his feelings but he will be okay
Relationships: Pope/jj onesided, john b/Sarah, pope/ kiera
Comments: 5
Kudos: 28





	If only he knew

JJ pov

It hurts. Love hurts

You might be thinking JJ , your 16 , of course is gonna hurt for you. Your not settling down or some of that adult bullshit. You just gotta suck it up. 

Ye maybe I am young and have a “full life ahead of me” but it doesn’t hurt less.

It hurts more then the bruises on my body , it hurts more then having to live with the person who gives you them bruises. 

Kiera is my best friend , but why do I loathe her right now. I shouldn’t . It’s not her fault. She doesn’t know I’m like this.

No one knows , not Kiera. Not John B either , it’s not like he would care at the moment . The guy is on the run for Christ sake. Right now the guy has at least 6 police boats after him and his girlfriend. 

Maybe one day if all this shit is over , we can all meet again and be friends again . John B , Kiera , Sarah and pope. 

Pope

God pope . Pope who confuses me to know end. If not with all the nerdy shit that comes out of his mouth , it’s the feeling that I get when he’s around. Cocky and arrogant. That’s how I act when that son of a bitch is around. Just trying to impress the smart basterd. I hope I impress him. 

Though I doubt he cares if im impressive or not . He’s to busy holding Kiera’s hand and worrying about our best friends . God I’m a shit friend , thinking about my stupid , sick feelings , as my friend is running for his life.

I can’t help it. I can’t help thinking about pope. 

God what would my dad say if he heard my thoughts . If he knew what I be thinking , he probably would just put a bullet to my head.

I wonder what John B , my best friend would say . There are no queers on this island . It’s small, we would all know. In all my life I have never met a queer man , but I guess I don’t have to meet one to know one.

Kiera is probably the only one who I know that would not give a shit. I don’t think the guys would care but I just feel like Kiera would 100% have my back. She would say some shit like “ it’s 2020 JJ , be out and proud.” 

I look over at her to see her and pope staring into each other’s eyes as if they have been together for years . News flash it’s been 3 hours . 3 hours of absolute sadness.

Cops in yellow rain suits walk in and make me forget my thoughts .

They talk but I’m not listen , I’m just waiting for the all clear , the John B and Sarah are over in mainlands and are throwing a party and we are all invited , the we did it.

No we don’t get that 

Lost 

My best friend is lost 

Lost , I think. Lost my ass . Lost is another way of saying dead. In the corner of my eye I see Kiera and pope silencely cry to them selfs . 

I see red and I just want to fight , to hurt someone like how I’m hurting , I feel to much pain and it’s not fair . I want it gone , I want pope to come over here , walk away from Kiera and hug me . God dammit someone hug me . Pope hold me please . 

I stop fighting as Kiera and popes parents come in . It makes me realize how alone I am. I don’t even look to see if my dad is there. He would never come for me. He doesn’t care , doesn’t care his son is hurting. Why would he care when me hurts me too. 

Both Kiera and pope are rapped in their parents arms and I just wanna leave and go home and drink, maybe find some weed , forget my sorrows.

Popes dad looks at me and reaches his arm out for me to join their family hug and I just lept right in , wanting some affection after this big shit show. Pope and I are in the middle of his parents arms and I just couldn’t help myself from clutching on to him with all my might . He returns the favour before going to Kiera.

Popes dad is a smart man and I know that , that’s where pope got his brains , he follows my stare as I keep watching after pope and Kiera cry into each other’s arms. He brings me back into a hug , saying all the things a good parent would. The it’s okays and I’m here .

He said something I don’t think he said to pope though , he said he loves you , they love who JJ, we all do son and as I look into the eyes of a man i see more as a father then my own I knew he knew.

And he was okay with it

It’s alright

I’m alright

Just a little fucked up , but who isn’t. 

I start to realize who I am is okay , it’s fine . I’m me and that’s it. 

But why can’t pope be like me too , feel like me too . Why why why

I keep saying that into popes dads neck . Why why why

Why John  
Why pope  
Why me

“JJ come here”

I look to see pope and Kiera holding each other close and beckoning me towards them . When i reach them , they pull me into their hug. 

It nice , it’s harm , it’s my best friends.

We all can’t help but wish John was here , cause John is the leader of this group and we all know it.  
We need John  
But I guess we can just hug each other instead, instead of trying to find the remains of our best friends , we should hug and cry because it’s only human 

Pope kisses the top of both me and Kiera’s heads . I hope to god he didn’t hear my heart go ninthy , if he did he didn’t mention it . 

I snuggle close into pope and think to myself 

If only he knew

**Author's Note:**

> Just finish this tv show and it was so good. I straight away fell in love with JJ and popes relationship. I couldn’t find any fanfics so I made my own. I hope someone will follow my lead and start making some fanfic too


End file.
